Dating 201: Receiving an Answer

-

How did you know that he's the one you want to marry?

I've asked my friends and even my sister this question many times before and their answers were all the same: "you just know." When I was a non-dating single sister, that answer was not helpful or even clear! I mean, the very reason I was asking is because I had no idea, so how will I "just know?" Right? (-.-)

Now that I'm getting married, I've had a few friends ask me this question and it makes me laugh because my answer is the same. You just know. Some describe it as an intuition, a gut feeling. But for the interest of blogging and helping out my dear sisters out there, let me break it down into simpler details.

Disclaimer: Each individual is different and we all receive inspiration in different ways. Trust your ability to receive an answer and you'll be fine.

The answer came a little bit at a time. It started with an interest, followed by an intent to see him again, which led to a lot of dates, hundreds of text messages, hours on the phone, holding hands, a yes to a proposal, and then tada! Here we are, planning a wedding. The point is, at each of those moments, there was a desire to take the relationship to the next level. The closest comparison I could think of is the process of how I gained a personal testimony of the Book of Mormon. I didn't gain a testimony all at once. It happened gradually as I read, pondered, and prayed about the things I was learning. The same with receiving an answer about getting married. It was a gradual experience which started with a shared interest that developed into attraction which eventually blossomed into love. (char!)

After we got engaged, there were moments when I asked myself, "Is he really the one I want to marry? Am I really sure about this?" I asked these questions not because of doubt, but because I wanted to have concrete answers as to WHY I want to marry him. I didn't want to just rely on my feelings. I wanted my decision to be a union of the heart and mind. It's given that decisions are often influenced by emotions, but to solely make a decision based on how one feels would also be foolish.

When I received the answer I was seeking, I stuck with that decision. No turning back. President Thomas S. Monson taught, "Choose your love; love your choice." This is important to remember because disagreements happen and they are not easy. When I get upset or hurt, I always remind myself of the time I received a confirmation of my decision and it strengthens me. I know that whatever disagreement we have does not change the answer I received from the Lord.

A confirmation can come in different ways, but one thing is for sure: You will receive an answer. Don't stress out, good things come to those who wait.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Dating 102: Diskarte Mode

-
Image
In my post Dating 101: You Will Survive , I shared some of the things I learned on how to gain happiness from within. That, for me, is the first step to surviving the dating scene. However, it doesn't mean that after you have gained inner happiness you can just give up on dating altogether. Woe unto you who do not try, for you will be judged according to your works! Hahaha! Dating is a battle field. It is important to be wise and strategic. Especially for us women. We need to provide opportunities for men to notice us. I think that is what people mean when they say that you have to make yourself available. How exactly do you do that? The following list may give you some idea. Avoid FLOCKS. Before I went to BYUH, my sister-in-law specifically advised me to avoid being surrounded with friends all the time. So true! Just imagine... How can a guy possibly ask you out if you always have an army of girlfriends with you? You need some alone time once in a while. Go to the li
Read more

What 13 Hours of Labor Taught Me

-
Image
I've heard many mothers describe the pain and ordeal of childbirth and I've read and received countless of suggestions on how to get through it like walking, squats, breathing exercises, yoga, etc. I knew it was going to be painful, but nothing prepared me for the discomfort that lay ahead. November 8, 2016, 11:30am. The start of my 13 hours of labor. I was already in so much pain prior to arriving at the hospital earlier that morning. I have been suffering from diarrhea for 3 days which was the very reason why we were in the hospital in the first place. I thought I was having contractions, but the frequent visit to the toilet proved otherwise. Gian was very worried that I'll dehydrate and that it might harm the baby, so we called my OB and was advised to go to the ER. My test came back positive with Amoebiasis and that's when my doctor decided that I have to be admitted. Within minutes, an IV line was inserted and medications were administered. I was fine for
Read more

Dating 101: You Will Survive!

-
Image
Some are just more fortunate in the dating scene than others. Well, good for them. Hahaha! But for a lot of people, dating is a battle field. We get hurt, we shed buckets of tears and we often wonder if we'll ever have our own happily ever after. To those who have asked the question, "when will it be my turn?", I testify that there is hope! The waiting may be long and challenging, but you shouldn't feel helpless. Besides, the best things in life are never rushed. Allow me to share with you five things I learned on how to survive the "waiting" period and truly enjoy being single. 1. All you need is LOVE. And who said that it should come from someone else? That love must come from within. This may be hard to believe for people who know me, but I grew up a very insecure kid and it was hard. I felt ugly and I was not comfortable in my own skin. I struggled and it was affecting my relationship with other people. So how did I get through it? I decided to in
Read more